Family support is important for people on a journey to improve their health, but many times family members don’t know how best to show compassion and care. Members of MyObesityTeam say loved ones often fall short of offering emotional, social, or practical support.

“Family can be your worst critics!” said one MyObesityTeam member. “I’m all alone here when it comes to losing weight. Nobody really understands how hard it is,” lamented another.

“My husband constantly makes comments that spiral me out of control. All I want to do is eat my feelings,” admitted another team member.

“My mother is always making comments about my weight and diet,” said one member. “I think she’s worried about what other people think.” Someone else said their husband and children pick on them until they “can’t stand it anymore.”

If you have a family member who is living with obesity, it’s important to recognize that obesity is a chronic disease with many causes. Stress, lack of sleep, and other factors of home life can make it harder to keep a balanced weight. Showing empathy and encouragement for a loved one with obesity can help them achieve a healthier lifestyle and a better quality of life.

Family members can be an important source of social support for loved ones with obesity. In fact, a report in the International Journal of Obesity suggests that social support might help people with obesity to lose weight.

Here are some things you can do to support a family member who has been diagnosed with obesity.

1. Tell Them You Care Without Judgment

It’s essential to let a loved one with obesity know that you care about them, and that you aren’t judging them. People with obesity are often stigmatized for their weight in the form of teasing, criticism, and discrimination. Research shows that people with higher body weights often identify their own family members as the main source of weight stigma in their lives.

Weight stigma — negative behavior, attitudes, media portrayals, and institutional policies toward someone with obesity — can take a toll on mental health. According to a 2025 study on people with body mass index (BMI) scores in the overweight or obese range, those who experienced weight stigma or weight bias reported worse mental health. Study participants with poor social support had higher rates of anxiety, depression, and loneliness. If you want to help a loved one with their health goals, you can start by telling them outright that you care about them and their well-being, and you want to be a source of support.

2. Don’t Blame a Loved One for Their Body Size

It’s never helpful to blame someone for their health or weight. High body weight can be caused by a number of different factors, including genetics, other health problems, hormone imbalances, stress, sleep deprivation, and medication side effects. Telling a loved one that they could lose weight if only they had more willpower or more personal responsibility is inappropriate and alienating.

Take time to learn more about the complex aspects of obesity and health that can affect someone both physically and mentally.

3. Avoid Body-Focused Language

Talking to someone about their body or body weight can have negative effects. This includes compliments about weight loss.

It’s important to avoid language that points to the body because it can make someone feel self-conscious, and it can be perceived as body-shaming or fat-shaming. Research has shown that fat-shaming can actually contribute to weight gain and poorer health because it causes stress that can lead to binge eating, depression, and anxiety.

4. Ask Questions Rather Than Give Advice

One way to show support is to ask your family member questions about how they feel and what kind of support they need. Listening without judgment can help them feel supported and can help you understand what kind of support could be most helpful.

Try open-ended questions to ask how a family member is feeling about their health or any recent lifestyle changes they’ve made. That will give them an opportunity to direct the conversation in a way that they feel comfortable with.

One MyObesityTeam member shared, “A nice restful day. I did my grocery shopping. I did some strengthening exercises twice yesterday. I enjoyed that instead of the treadmill. Nice change. My husband and I talked about some emotions I was going through concerning my weight loss and food addiction.”

5. Join Them in Their Health Journey

You can show support by joining a family member in activities that encourage healthy behaviors, eating habits, and physical activity. Some things you can do together include:

• Helping with meal planning and grocery shopping for healthy food choices that don’t have added sugar or saturated fats
• Preparing meals together that encourage healthy eating
• Taking walks or joining an exercise group together
• Attending a weight loss program together

“My family is starting a fitness/weight loss challenge among us. We took a family walk tonight. It was fun. I hope we can keep it up,” a MyObesityTeam member shared.

Someone else wrote, “I love my husband! He says ‘Honey, let’s play Pokémon Go. That way we can do something as a couple and get some exercise.’ Best husband ever! LOL.”

Another member said, “My daughter and grandson came over today. We made homemade zucchini lasagna. It was actually better than I expected it to taste.”

6. Encourage Professional Guidance

For some people, professional help can be an important step in managing weight, getting appropriate treatment, and developing a healthy lifestyle.

You may have opinions about whether a weight loss plan or weight loss surgery is best for your loved one, but there are professional medical and psychological approaches to treating obesity. Everyone’s condition is unique, particularly if they are living with other health conditions such as type 2 diabetes, heart disease, hypertension (high blood pressure), sleep apnea, or an eating disorder.

If your family member expresses a need for guidance in making health changes, you can gently encourage them to see a healthcare professional for a medical evaluation, seek psychological counseling, or consult with a dietitian. If they don’t already participate in a support group, it can be helpful to encourage that as well.

“I’m in a program, and a lady comes to my house. She’s a behavior specialist. I see her every other week,” a MyObesityTeam member said.

“I found help with a therapist,” another member said, about seeking treatment for emotional eating.

7. If a Family Member Talks About Their Weight, Be a Good Listener

A loved one with obesity probably knows more about the condition than you do. Most people with obesity have tried to lose weight or maintain a healthy weight with various diets and different types of exercise, often with frustrating results. Their health struggles are likely deeper than simply making lifestyle changes.

If a family member feels like starting a conversation with you about their weight management and health, the best thing you can do is listen. Ask what you can do to support them, but let them talk freely about their condition and weight loss goals without adding your opinions or advice.

8. Respect Their Boundaries

Weight is a very sensitive subject for many people. It’s important to respect someone’s boundaries by not pushing a loved one in a conversation. It’s important to respect that your family member needs to make their own decisions.

Be attentive to the feelings that can emerge in a conversation about weight. Show them that you respect their boundaries and pull back if you sense any level of discomfort.

9. Offer Information Instead of Opinions

If your loved one asks for help in thinking about health goals, it can be helpful to provide evidence-based information on weight and health for people with obesity. Scientific studies or information from well-respected hospitals or universities can provide your loved one with perspectives that may help them make healthier decisions. You can find this type of information online or at a library.

Researching reliable information on weight loss, health, and healthy habits can show a loved one that you take their condition seriously. Solid information may also help a family member have more productive conversations with their healthcare providers or make healthier decisions.

Talk With Others Who Understand

MyObesityTeam is the social network for people with obesity and their loved ones. On MyObesityTeam, more than 57,000 members come together to ask questions, give advice, and share their stories with others who understand life with a higher body weight.

Has your family been helpful in your weight management journey? What kind of family support would you find most useful? Share your comments below, or start a conversation by posting on your Activities page.