Say "No" by Saying "Yes" to Something Else

Posted on June 05, 2019

Saying "no" with grace and honesty can be challenging. Sometimes our fear of ending a conversation awkwardly or letting a friend or relative down can nudge us into saying "yes" to things that are difficult for us. When managing obesity, saying "no" can feel more complicated. Will they ever ask again? Will the invites stop coming? Have I said "no" too often?

An alternative way to say "no" is to create a third option, another choice. For instance, you are invited to a party, but you don’t have the energy to socialize in a group setting. You could say, “I won’t make it to the party, but maybe we can get coffee next week?”

Bad days or fatigue arising out of the blue are beyond your control. Asking for a raincheck or suggesting a future get-together instead shows it's important to you but lets you focus on self-care.

Here are some conversations from the community about this topic:

“I did not want to sound rude so I could not tell him not to fix pasta though I have cut that pretty much out of my diet.”

“At some social gatherings, it would be rude to not at least try small things.”

“I used the three bites trick and really enjoyed those bites.”

Have you found alternative ways of saying "no," without saying "no?"
Share in the comments below.

A MyObesityTeam Member said:

I liked the "three bite trick"...Let the person know you were willing to meet them at some level of comfort. As I have gotten older...I know that many… read more

posted 5 months ago

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